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Post by Tyler on Apr 22, 2003 12:59:14 GMT -5
So i realized a little while ago that i'm a bit of an idiot. this came as quite a surprise to me because I always thought I was smart. Maybe I still am, but I somehow feel as though I've squandered whatever intelligence i once had. As I read the posts that other people put on here I think that all you people have put a lot of time and thought into these ideas, and I don't seem to be able to contribute anything, because I don't think I've had a really deep philosophical idea in a while. Perhaps the mental unrest of my youth was caused be the hormonal turrent constantly raging in my adolescent body, and now that I'm grown (I'm 21, so pretty much) my emotions have settled and i'm less inclined to rage and theorize about the universe. Maybe I've found some sort of peace with the Universe. I've always been kind of agnostic in that I don't think you can really know for sure (i'm very fond of science) if there is a god or anything like that, so it could be that I've gotten lazy and just write off all those tricky questions by saying "I can't really know anyway, so what's the point?"
Generally my point is that I think I've become intellectually lazy lately and am vowing to change that. I'm going to be a scientist. Hone my mind into a dangerous weapon of mass destruction. I'll quit drinking coffee (i have a theory that caffeine is destroying my central nervous system), but mostly I'm going to stop pretending that I'm smart.
At this point I've forgotten why I thought it would be a good idea to post this here, so i'll refer back to the subject line: Does anyone else ever feel like this?
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Post by holygoat0106 on Apr 22, 2003 13:17:23 GMT -5
i do,
most the time i just end up spinning things off as they come up, believe me i have no time to reflect upon what i know and how intelligent i really am. i swear to god some times i feel like i have an iq equivalent to that of a piece of toast. others, i know what i know, just relax ty, its ok.
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Post by Arkham on Apr 22, 2003 21:20:02 GMT -5
what you're describing is apathy and everyone goes through it.
i always do my best thinking when i'm really worried about something.
read a book, fly a kite, kill a kitten. do something stimulating and get your brain jogging again.
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Post by holygoat0106 on Apr 24, 2003 23:32:27 GMT -5
 kill a kitten? im not sure if you're really serious about some of the things you say, i cant see your face, or look at you directly when you speak so i can make a sound judgement of your intentions behind the comments you make, but honestly, r u ok? you talk about some things that are, no offense kind of depressing, i know, ive been that way before(not like this) but if u feel really bad about something you should vent. cuz, i just really get the vibe that you're a sad person. and thats no good.....cuz then you get screwed up, really bad.
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Post by Tyler on Apr 25, 2003 11:05:24 GMT -5
I read books, I fly kites. No kittens though. I started reading about the contributions made to mathematics in India, and that got a small blip out of me. There were lots of cool ideas coming out of that culture.
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Post by Arkham on Apr 26, 2003 2:25:02 GMT -5
i can assure you that i am not serious when i talk about killing kittens or enjoying the company of dead babies. i just have a really bizarre sense of humour. my own best friends don't know when i'm joking sometimes, but i kind of like it that way, especially when they never really know for sure. it's sort of like going to the movies by yourself and then not telling anyone. as far as the venting goes i vent through www.soundclick.com/bands/7/bradwellmusic.htm which is my band. sorry for finally doing the band advertisement, it seems like such a coolioso thing to do but i figured i might as well. if you don't want to check it out, don't worry about it. i'm actually generally a really optimistic guy, but i do try to be honest about the shit days. the good days by far outweigh the bad ones however. thanks for the comment though. it sincerly was very touching. i think it's kind of good to be tormented sometimes. it gives people something to look at in your eyes. |
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Post by holygoat0106 on Apr 26, 2003 10:08:03 GMT -5
 very true. i tried to listen in but theyre all skipping, and what instrument do you play? or are you a lyricist like myself?
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Post by Arkham on Apr 26, 2003 11:54:25 GMT -5
that's weird that they were skipping... i've never heard of that happening with mp3's before.
i play bass and i sing. all the lyrics are at mp3.com under bradwell if you wanted to see them.
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Post by holygoat0106 on Apr 27, 2003 11:34:08 GMT -5
so i went to the psychic fair yesterday and spoke with a clairvoyant, apparently the reason i have such trouble being in public is because im clairsensient and clairaudient.clairaudient to a lesser degree. it totally rings true for me, as he said,' you have a sensory overload everytime you walk into a mall.' my fiance says i always act funny when im in public and im always worrying about my health, and the clairvoyant said that i am empathic and end up taking on everyones emotions, so that most the time only a small percentage of the time, i am experiencing my own emotions. see, i read tarot cards and he said that im bored of it; which i totally am! but he said ive been doing them for the past 200 yrs.(reincarnately speaking). its just so crazy, because i knew there was something there, like i had some second sight and i do. i never even knew there was such a thing as clairsensience or empathics. let me explain the difference,clairsensience is when you can feel things, like vibes, and everyones problems and what theyre thinking is what i feel. empaths are people who when people are happy they are just as elated for no reason, and when people are sad or angry the emotions deeply rub off on the empathic person. see, there's a huge difference between empathic and empathetic. it's like the last show, i showed up and by the end of the first band i had a searing headache and by the time the second band had played i was so hot and sweating. i couldnt stay cause i was literally getting nauseous from the headache. i thought i was gonna puke in the cab on the way home. just like when i used to play piano on stage, i would get tremors, i mean fucking TREMORS. anywyas, im glad to have found out why the doctor cant tell me why i feel like crap ALL the time, because physically there is nothing wrong with me, myself. anyways, its not that im special, we all have these kinds of abilities inside our minds some people however have to work harder to grasp them and use them properly, like how i have no control over feeling peoples emotions and pain, and when i receive it i cant give it back. everyones strengths are in different areas but i knew there was something with me that wasnt right. at least i can be a good judge of character with this. and i have gotten shiveries really bad around certain people of whom i have never met, one of which i later found out has aids from needles. i know some of you dont particularly believe in this phenomenon but everyone is skeptical until they get a reading done for themselves. i have found out ultimately why i have such trouble acting like myself in public and why i hear weird and sometimes creepy things, and why i have aches and pains to such an extent that i have to leave a crowded area and go home. im not crazy, im not blasphemous, and im not sick.
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farva
Go Away
fine, no cream.
Posts: 123
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Post by farva on Apr 27, 2003 15:34:54 GMT -5
yeah.
you can make yourself believe any thing.
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Post by holygoat0106 on Apr 27, 2003 22:36:20 GMT -5
oh and when did u decide to show up?? u know i dont remember u being present for any of the discussions we've had in here, im almost sure you wouldnt measure up to the people in here when it comes to what u really know in contrast to the three year old lines u spit out in the stall. please enlighten me. by all means, dazzle us all with your stellar wit.
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Post by jaeonfire on May 5, 2003 13:27:54 GMT -5
So i realized a little while ago that i'm a bit of an idiot. this came as quite a surprise to me because I always thought I was smart. Maybe I still am, but I somehow feel as though I've squandered whatever intelligence i once had. As I read the posts that other people put on here I think that all you people have put a lot of time and thought into these ideas, and I don't seem to be able to contribute anything, because I don't think I've had a really deep philosophical idea in a while. Perhaps the mental unrest of my youth was caused be the hormonal turrent constantly raging in my adolescent body, and now that I'm grown (I'm 21, so pretty much) my emotions have settled and i'm less inclined to rage and theorize about the universe. Maybe I've found some sort of peace with the Universe. I've always been kind of agnostic in that I don't think you can really know for sure (i'm very fond of science) if there is a god or anything like that, so it could be that I've gotten lazy and just write off all those tricky questions by saying "I can't really know anyway, so what's the point?" Generally my point is that I think I've become intellectually lazy lately and am vowing to change that. I'm going to be a scientist. Hone my mind into a dangerous weapon of mass destruction. I'll quit drinking coffee (i have a theory that caffeine is destroying my central nervous system), but mostly I'm going to stop pretending that I'm smart. At this point I've forgotten why I thought it would be a good idea to post this here, so i'll refer back to the subject line: Does anyone else ever feel like this? I feel like I realized you were a bit of an idiot, but a long time ago. I think that's why we became friends - it's that scientifically unexplainable force that draws two idiots together and coerces them to find other idiots and then again to form a band. I feel the way you are talking about all the time. It could be apathy - we are smart people, we generally know the difference between right and wrong, and yet seldom do we act out against an injustice unless it's absolutely unavoidable. I guess that's a bit of an exaggeration, but you know I am to a greater extent than you even, full of shit most of the time. It could also be one of those plateau's you reach in your life, things aren't really bad - so you have no right to complain, and yet things aren't really as exciting as they used to be??? I guess people need to maintain a steady diet of discovery, we need to continue to find things that move us emotionally, so we don't become mutually at ease with existing. I think that's what boredom is. I'm going travelling - when I get back we should tour, and I definitely think a "take this job and shove it" will improve your daily outlook, I know it would improve mine. |
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Post by chad loin on May 5, 2003 13:52:31 GMT -5
hey jae-
this is chad from bombs away. do you wanna meet up in spain? or something.
my email is choadalop@hotmail.com...
peace
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Post by adiisnointhewack on May 18, 2003 6:26:45 GMT -5
Well, I am a recovering alcoholic (I've been sober for 4 months), and quitting drinking was a HUGE turnpoint in my life. I think my band was what gave me the strength to go with it, and I can honestly say that I've never felt better about myself and my outlook on life. I was at a point in my life where all I could think about was booze, without really understanding that it was a problem, until I just couldn't get a grip on my own life. I think i searched for solutions in the bottle, without looking around and seeing the people and the elements that surround my life. Now that I've taken the time to smash the bottle and look around, I finally feel in control. I know this is a horrible cliche, but I can honestly say that music saved my life.
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Post by Jack The Stripper on May 31, 2003 3:44:28 GMT -5
what you're describing is apathy and everyone goes through it. i always do my best thinking when i'm really worried about something. read a book, fly a kite, kill a kitten. do something stimulating and get your brain jogging again. Kill a kitten? Do you mean masturbate? (you know.. that picture with a kitten and on the bottom of it saying "Everytime you masturbate, God kills a kitten") Maybe I should get some sleep. |
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kill a kitten? im not sure if you're really serious about some of the things you say, i cant see your face, or look at you directly when you speak so i can make a sound judgement of your intentions behind the comments you make, but honestly, r u ok? you talk about some things that are, no offense kind of depressing, i know, ive been that way before(not like this) but if u feel really bad about something you should vent. cuz, i just really get the vibe that you're a sad person. and thats no good.....cuz then you get screwed up, really bad.
very true. i tried to listen in but theyre all skipping, and what instrument do you play? or are you a lyricist like myself?
